CHAPTER 12 - Goodbye 2025
Belated year in review, except it is pretty vague
At the risk of sounding too online (and perhaps dated), 2025 truly did feel like being awake during surgery so I want to keep this as brief as possible. I’ve been reflecting a lot on last year and at this point I’m tired of talking about it.
Most of 2025 was spent in grief which I wrote about here. As painful and as difficult as the year was I remain grateful for the lessons learned, the new friendships I made, and the old friendships that deepened. Some highlights of the year include falling in love with yin yoga (still looking for a studio I like here), learning the value of daily park time, watching more movies than I ever have as an adult, moving, realizing I had low-grade dysphoria for like five years, the numerous times my friends visited me this year (including some friends I haven’t seen in a very long time), and developing more comfort being alone which I think has contributed to a large amount of healing and confidence. I had two therapists this year (I had to replace the first one when I moved) and both of them are so different but have been so helpful, and I’ve journaled more this year than I have before.
I enter 2025 with such a defined sense of self and a better understanding of what my limits are which in turn allows me to set better boundaries, stand up for myself, and leave situations that do not feel aligned with what my goals are. I am also slightly more guarded which I hope will pass, but I am really taking the job of protecting myself seriously. I am still hopeful that I am warm and open to love and connection but I know I do so with a sense of caution.
I also consumed some art which I documented for a TikTok (truly debating deleting that app this year) and realized that it was art that pulled me through every period of depression this past year. Whenever I felt lonely I would see a Saturday matinee at the local Atlanta theater that played indies, and I’m also remembering when I spent a weekend re-reading Communion by bell hooks, taking a brief breather then turning around and reading it again. I re-read three books in 2025 which felt a little silly but I was just so out of it I needed something fun. Also at this point I’ve realized that whenever I feel the slightest bit sad if I go to see a movie alone at BAM I tend to feel instantly better.
In terms of other art I listened to 93,000 minutes of music last year which I think is probably very very bad but it was really really good for me. I went to two poetry readings (both featuring my friend LA), two nature events (I got really into Bat season this year), and two queer history tours. I read 37 books and watched 52 films (20+ in person), I saw a dance performance by Kinetic Light which was SO cool, four concerts/music performances (several more if I sit down and think about it), a comedy show, three documentary screenings, one knitting night, and I did a multi-week writing workshop. I also started knitting again and accidentally went too hard and knit eight items in two months. I also went to four book talks. Pretty much 75% of this art intake happened after I moved which is exhilarating and shows that moving so that I could be more creatively inspired made sense. Something I’m proud of is re-starting CHAPTERS too! It has been great having this outlet.
I have some goals for next year but the primary ones are to create more art and interact with more art. I am on week four of The Artists’ Way and that has been very helpful. I feel so creatively inspired already this year and I’m realizing just how creatively numb I was previously. I’m hoping to take more classes this year (I have one this weekend on weaving) and want to engage with more fiber artists. Knitting has surprisingly made me more inspired to write because it pushes me to use different parts of my creative muscle. I’m applying to more things this year and my first book will be complete. I also want to push myself and engage with more art outside of my comfort zone of writing and reading prose. So that means really looking for events regularly that I can attend, connecting with other artists and staying open. But that also means being a little more protective of my writing time and focusing on creating some things I can be really proud of. I would also like to read my writing publicly this year so if that is of interest to anyone let me know.
I feel proud of myself for getting through the last year and I am remain optimistic for 2026. Writing remains a constant in my life and I know it will be here for me regardless of how the year goes and I thank you for reading this blog where I am allowed to try some things out.
K